The Top 10 Things Your Doctor Won’t Tell You About Babies, Birthing, and all that jazz!
10. You will probably get very nauseated during the procedure and end up vomiting the ice chips they gave you to substitute as your food. Yum.
9. If you are keeping any secrets, they will quite possibly surface if your epidural wears off or you are doing a natural birth. Don’t invite anyone in the room that you’re hiding something from.
8. The first time you try to do anything at all–sneeze, move, roll over, or
even sit up straight, after the medication wears off is going to
show you that you had muscles you didn’t know existed...and they will hurt. Plus the added bonus of possibly peeing yourself everytime you sneeze lol.
7. When Your Milk comes in it’s going to feel like someone has placed
needles in your chest {which incidentally feel like they weigh 100 lbs.each and feel hard as rocks}. The whole stabbing feeling does go away eventually.
6. If you have any other children they will be thinking and behaving one of two ways:
“Oh no, what if something happens to mom?”
or “Mom’s going to be in the hospital–VACATION AND CANDY FOR BREAKFAST!”
5. You thought your hormones went nuts in the first trimester–HA!! Just wait!
4. Bring a backup take-home outfit. Your new little bundle of joy will
undoubtedly make a very large, messy diaper that will some how seep
through (or around the edges of the diaper) and get all over their clothes.
3. Your husband will like your new chest and jokingly offer to buy you one
just like it.
2. Pay very close attention to the “rules and regulations” of being in the hall
with your new little one. He/She is probably wearing an ankle bracelet that hasthe potential to set off alarms and lock down a whole hospital floor if you
come too close to an exit door or elevator…people don’t like it when you
do that.
1. The first time you hear your baby cry will be the most wonderful
moment in your life…there will be many great moments
after that, but none that make you feel the same way. Relief, Joy, Nervousness…all at once.
10. You will probably get very nauseated during the procedure and end up vomiting the ice chips they gave you to substitute as your food. Yum.
9. If you are keeping any secrets, they will quite possibly surface if your epidural wears off or you are doing a natural birth. Don’t invite anyone in the room that you’re hiding something from.
8. The first time you try to do anything at all–sneeze, move, roll over, or
even sit up straight, after the medication wears off is going to
show you that you had muscles you didn’t know existed...and they will hurt. Plus the added bonus of possibly peeing yourself everytime you sneeze lol.
7. When Your Milk comes in it’s going to feel like someone has placed
needles in your chest {which incidentally feel like they weigh 100 lbs.each and feel hard as rocks}. The whole stabbing feeling does go away eventually.
6. If you have any other children they will be thinking and behaving one of two ways:
“Oh no, what if something happens to mom?”
or “Mom’s going to be in the hospital–VACATION AND CANDY FOR BREAKFAST!”
5. You thought your hormones went nuts in the first trimester–HA!! Just wait!
4. Bring a backup take-home outfit. Your new little bundle of joy will
undoubtedly make a very large, messy diaper that will some how seep
through (or around the edges of the diaper) and get all over their clothes.
3. Your husband will like your new chest and jokingly offer to buy you one
just like it.
2. Pay very close attention to the “rules and regulations” of being in the hall
with your new little one. He/She is probably wearing an ankle bracelet that hasthe potential to set off alarms and lock down a whole hospital floor if you
come too close to an exit door or elevator…people don’t like it when you
do that.
1. The first time you hear your baby cry will be the most wonderful
moment in your life…there will be many great moments
after that, but none that make you feel the same way. Relief, Joy, Nervousness…all at once.
These are great and SO true !
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